The Scaredy-Cat's Halloween
It was quite a relief to be saying goodbye to her nanny at last, even if her parents refused to acknowledge that it was strange that she was leaving right before the Christmas season was about to start, just as she'd shown up the year before right as it ended. They seemed to see it as just a coincidence, and her insistence that it was something else as yet another sign of how childish the nearly 20 year old girl still was - a confirmation, of sorts, that she needed the nanny in the first place.
But Sierra knew the truth. Her nanny was an elf, sent there the year before by Santa to give her a second chance to grow up. It had apparently taken longer than the elf had expected - once she'd broken the girl's potty training, it had proven quite difficult to rebuild it, much more than she'd expected - as she was rather upset to be leaving a work in progress, but her other job beckoned, leaving her little choice but to go, at least for now.
"You be a good girl," she instructed, giving Sierra firm swat across the backside, making the girl squeak and squirm in her Pull-Ups, her bottom already sore from a spanking the day before. "If you keep up with your potty training, we might be able to move on to big girl panties when I get back."
Sierra stared up at her with big eyes, hardly able to believe what she was hearing. It felt like ages since she'd worn those! She couldn't quite recall how they felt anymore, not really, though sometimes she told herself she could, just to make herself feel a little better. She knew it couldn't be as long as it seemed, that her memory, and that of her parents, had been messed with in order to get them to hire a nanny for their 19 year old daughter, but she knew it had to have been at least ten months. "Really?!"
"IF you're a good girl," her nanny repeated. "You're not getting them until I think you have a shot at not ruining every other pair I put you in. So if you have too many accidents, it isn't happening - in fact, we may have to start all over again. And you know I'll be watching."
"Yes, ma'am," Sierra nodded. She gave the nanny a hug, and got one in return, along with a kiss on the forehead, before being left alone while the nanny went off to say goodbye to her parents, leaving her alone in her room, squirming anxiously.
It wasn't just that she was nervous she'd have too many accidents. That was part of it, since even before this started, she would wet herself a little every now and then - she tried to tell herself that was part of the memories the nanny had planted, but there was something about them that felt different. But, as much as she hated to admit it, she felt more confident with her potty training than she ever had before, even if she was still stuck in training pants for the time being. Depending on how reliable her memory was, she might be having less accidents now than she had before this whole mess started, and yet she still hadn't been deemed worthy of real panties yet.
That was certainly a part of her anxiety, but the thing that worried her more was what time of year it was. It almost felt as if the elf had chosen the worst possible time to subject her to this test, just to make sure she would fail. It was the day before Halloween, a time that had always been quite stressful for the poor girl. The idea of playing dress up and getting rewarded with candy for it was nice, of course, but that was about it. It was hard to go out without running across some creepy looking decoration, hard to turn on the television without stumbling into the middle of some gruesome, horrifying movie. The general atmosphere made everything feel spookier, to the point where she was practically jumping out of her skin at the sight of her own shadow.
And that was all before she'd met the nanny. Now, having met her, Sierra knew for a fact that Santa was real - not that she'd ever really doubted it that much to begin with - which led her to wonder what other stories were, too. Could ghosts be real? Werewolves? Vampires? She'd made it through her other Halloweens by telling herself those couldn't be real, but that was going to sound even less convincing now. Not to mention the fact that she'd spent the year treated like an infant, very gradually making her way to the status of a toddler. She still had her own mind, but spending all that time being treated like a helpless child made it much harder to remember that she wasn't one.
She certainly didn't feel lke one as she crept out of her room and to the front door, doing her best not to listen to what the nanny and her parents were saying, knowing it was about her. She'd already seen the huge list of instructions that had been left for her babysitters so they could pick up where nanny had left off. She didn't want to hear any more of that sort of thing. She played with the hem of her dress as she waited, shuffling her feet and staring down at them. Should she bother with this? Or would it just make her look silly? It was hard to worry about that too much, after spending all year with her nanny, but there was still a touch of grown up dignity left in her.
Though there was, perhaps, a little less left as she jumped at the sudden sound of, "What are you doing out here, sweetie?" Despite her best efforts to hide it, she could feel her eyes widening slightly, and she saw her nanny's expression turn to disappointment, knowing just what had happened. The elf marched over to her, flipping up her skirt to reveal Sierra's now damp Pull-Up. "You are not off to a good start, young lady."
"You scared me," Sierra whined.
"If that's all it took, then I clearly didn't do a good enough job," the nanny shook her head. "Should I tell your parents to keep you diapered full time instead, to get you ready for a fresh start when I get back?"
"No," Sierra pouted. "I'll do better."
"I hope so." Her voice softened as she said, "Did you come to say goodbye to me again?" Sierra nodded and got another hug. "I'll miss you."
"I'll miss you, too." And, in a way, she would. She'd been around for so long, it would seem strange not to have her there. Plus, without her, she would be subjected to some unknown babysitter, who might be nice, or might not. At least with her nanny, she knew what to expect, even if she didn't always like it. "Umm... Hey... Can I ask you a question?"
"Sure. But you know I'm not allowed to talk about my other job."
"I know," Sierra nodded. "Umm... Are... Are ghosts real?"
The nanny looked down at her with a slightly surprised smile, apparently speechless for the first time since Sierra met her, which was enough of an answer for Sierra. "Hey, don't worry. There's nothing that can hurt you. If you just close your eyes and count to five, any scary thing you see will go away, or at least seem a whole lot less scary."
"And if it doesn't work, I won't get in trouble if I have an accident?" Sierra asked hopefully.
"Don't push your luck, young lady." The nanny gave her another swat on the bottom, then, after a final goodbye, went on her way.
Sierra would have liked to go change into a fresh Pull-Up herself, but she had no doubt her nanny would find out about it somehow, so she shuffled to the living room to confess to her accident before being led back to her room for a change. She was less than pleased when her mother put her into one of her thick, pink overnight diapers - a kind she'd never seen before her nanny had brought them, and which the nanny had left a rather large supply of "just in case" - instead of another Pull-Up, and was even less happy when she was sat up afterward and had her dress taken off and replaced with her footed sleeper.
"But it's not bedtime!" she protested, stomping her padded foot on the floor in a huff.
"Behave yourself, young lady!" her mother snapped. "Your nanny warned us your behavior might backslide after she left unless we were firm with you. You know it's naughty to go potty in your pants, and so is throwing a tantrum, so you're going to bed early. And if you say another word about it, I'll have daddy give you a spanking."
"Yes, mommy," Sierra sighed, climbing into her bed, letting her mother pull the side rail up. She supposed she should be happy she didn't have to sleep in a crib, but this was hardly better. "Night-night."
"Goodnight, sweetheart." Her mother flipped off the light and started to close the door.
"Wait!" Sierra whimpered. Her mother realized right away what she'd forgotten, and reached down to flip on the girl's nightlight before leaving the room. Sierra felt silly, but she'd grown awfully accustomed to the nightlight while she was being treated like a baby, and now that the shadows were growing deeper, and there were Halloween ghouls behind every corner, she couldn't get to sleep without it. And, unfortunately, she couldn't turn it on herself. She might not have to sleep in a crib, but the bed rails were just as bad, as it seemed they had some sort of spell on them that prevented her from getting out of bed once they were pulled into place. She imagined it was very similar to being in a crib, only worse, since there was no visible reason she couldn't climb over them and get out, so it looked like she stayed there by choice.
Other than the fact that it meant if she got put down to bed, or even a nap, with a full bladder, and without asking to use the potty first, she'd have to use her diaper, the idea of being stuck in her bed wasn't particularly scary. But now, without her nanny to protect her from whatever was out there, it felt like she'd been trussed up and offered up to any monster that happened to pass by. Her nightlight suddenly became a curse, since that light caused shadows, and now they all seemed to be moving, growing horns and claws and coming closer.
She knew it was just her imagination, but even so, she was sure she could hear breathing, hooves scraping across the floor as they came closer, and closer. She whimpered, wriggling helplessly in her bed. It went against every instinct she had, but her nanny generally seemed to know what she was talking about, so she covered her eyes, squeezing them shut, and started to count out loud - quietly, not wanting to draw too much attention to herself, not just from the monsters, but also from her parents.
"One..." she whispered. "Two..." She jumped as she heard a scraping sound, uncovering her eyes in a panic to see the silhouette of something outside her window. She swallowed a scream, barely noticing her diaper grow damp. "Th-Three..." She couldn't make her eyes close, so she just put her hands over them again. "Four... Five!"
She spread her fingers, staring through them. Sure enough, the shadows all looked normal again, the thing behind her curtain looked much more like a tree than a huge, skeletal hand, and she felt much better. At least until her mommy came in to see what all the noise was about and found her wet again already.
"I fell asleep!" Sierra claimed. "You know I still have bedwetting problems!" A year ago, she would have found it humiliating to say that, but after everything she'd been through since then, it seemed like nothing. Not to mention it was true. And, in her mother's memory, and even her own, those bedwetting problems stretched back even further than this baby treatment - she thought that was another false memory, but it was hard to be sure anymore.
Her mommy shook her head, staring down at Sierra on her changing mat, wet diaper removed. "Why are you lying to me, honey? I know you didn't have time to fall asleep yet, and I just put you to bed. If you still had to go potty, you should have asked me!"
"I'm sorry," Sierra sniffled.
"I'd ask you if you still needed to go, but I don't know that I can trust you, so come on." Sierra found herself being pulled over to where her pink plastic potty sat, but instead of being put on it, she was handed it, then herded to the living room, naked. Her parents had both seen her naked quite recently, but she still blushed a little as her daddy looked up from the TV and saw her. Her mother took the potty from her and sat her down on it. "She had another accident," her mommy told her daddy as she went to sit herself, as if Sierra wasn't there. "And she lied about it."
"I think I'd better give her a spanking once she's done on the potty," her daddy said, much to her dismay.
"No!" she pouted. "That's not fair! I..." She was cut off by her mother getting back up and shoving her pacifier into her mouth. Like her bed, it had some enchantment on it that kept her from speaking normally, or doing much of anything but sucking on it once it was in, and kept her from removing it herself. Sulking, she looked over at the TV, trying to forget what was waiting for her, just in time to see a killer jump out of the shadows and start chasing some poor girl. She mumbled behind her pacifier, trying to get them to change the channel, but they couldn't understand her.
She closed her eyes, but that only made things worse, as she could still hear the knife sinking into the girl's flesh over and over, and she was left to imagine the details. Her bladder was empty by now, but she had no doubt that mental image would return to her in her dreams, and that would ensure a wet diaper in the morning, to go with her freshly-sore bottom.
She was right on all counts.
She was a little nervous that her parents would hire one of her old friends as her babysitter - after all, a lot of them had complained at one time or another that hanging out with her was like babysitting, even before she went through her diaper training - but the woman who showed up at the door was older than any of them by a good few years. She stood by like a toddler, blushing as she listened to her mother go over her care with the woman, down to telling her that she was having accidents lately, and if she had another, she was to go in diapers for the rest of the day. She gave an indignant huff as she heard that, but neither woman paid her any mind.
"Hello, there!" the babysitter said to her once they were alone. "You can call me Miss Claire! What's your name, cutie?"
Sierra felt silly, knowing the woman surely knew her name already, but said, "I'm Sierra," anyway.
"What a pretty name! Now, do you want to sit on the potty for me like a good girl before we leave?"
"I don't have to go," Sierra informed her, before realizing what else the woman had said. "Where are we going?"
"Try anyway." The potty was still in the living room from the night before, so Sierra was plopped back down onto it, Pull-Ups at her knees. "We're going to find you a Halloween costume!"
"I'm not going trick-or-treating," Sierra said. She didn't need that kind of stress, walking around waiting to be scared by some random teenager, not when she was already in trouble.
"But you're going to be a big girl and help mommy and daddy pass out candy, aren't you?" Sierra shrugged, having not really thought about it, but her babysitter nodded.
Even though she didn't really know Miss Claire, she found herself sticking quite close to the woman as they went into the costume shop and found themselves in a madhouse. "Busy, aren't they?" Miss Claire chuckled. "I guess you should have come earlier in the month."
"Let's just go," Sierra whined, tugging at the woman's hand. "I don't wanna dress up."
"Aww, come on," Miss Claire said, tugging back, pulling the girl further into the store. "It's once a year!"
She knew that they were just costumes, but the rows of masks staring back at her were quite unnerving, as were all the people running around wearing them. "Do you want to be scary?" Miss Claire asked, making Sierra immediately shake her head. "Okay, then something cute."
Sierra nodded. It was what she always went with, even when her friends were going for sexy instead, and trying to convince her to do the same. She just didn't have the body to pull off most of the sexy costumes you could find, and now that she had a Pull-Up, at the very least, to hide, that made things all the harder.
"I think the little girl section is over here," Miss Claire said, leading Sierra away to a much calmer aisle. "There's not much left," she observed. "You could be a princess. Or a fairy. Or a ladybug. That would be cute!" She grabbed the ladybug costume and held it up to Sierra, shaking her head. "No, they don't have any big enough sizes left." She put it back, looking a bit disappointed. "There's a witch, but that's a little scary, huh? Maybe an angel?"
"A fairy would be okay," Sierra said quietly.
"Oh, good choice!" Miss Claire exclaimed, grabbing the costume. "I bet this would fit!" She hurried Sierra over to the fitting room, then, to the girl's embarrassment if not surprise, went inside with her, pulling the costume on over her pants and shirt. The dress was blue, with a very fluffy, and short, skirt, set off on one side by a bow. It almost looked like a ballerina costume, until Miss Claire added the wings, which were a delicate web of pink. "Perfect!" she declared.
But once they got to the line for checkout, she realized that wasn't quite so. "We forgot to get a wand!" she said suddenly. "You have to have a wand!"
"I don't really..." Sierra said, but now that Miss Claire had thought of it, she did kind of want one.
"I'd hate to lose our spot in the line," Miss Carol mused, looking back at all the people who had stepped in behind them already. She looked down at Sierra skeptically. "Do you think you could go get one?" she asked. "I saw them on the other side of the aisle the costume was on. Do you remember how to get there? Will you be okay on your own?"
Sierra's pride won out over her nerves. "Yes," she pouted. "I'm not a baby, you know!" But as she stormed back across the store, it seemed to get bigger, more crowded. When she turned back to look at her babysitter, she could barely even see the woman, there were so many people, fighting over the last scraps left in the store. A man pulled on a werewolf mask, then stared straight at her, and, even though she'd just seen him put it on, her blood still ran cold for a moment before she turned and scurried for the aisle.
"Boo!" Sierra jumped, scrambling back, looking all around for who had said that, just before hearing an eerie cackling. "Hello?" she squeaked, setting off a ghostly moan. She turned around, starting to freak out before finally noticing the plastic ghost and witch on the shelf in front of her, winding down. "Hello?" she said again, and, sure enough, they sprang back to life.
She laughed nervously at herself, realizing she was in the wrong aisle and stepping out and over to the right one. She could see the wands, right where Miss Claire had said they'd be. Happy that her little adventure was nearly over, she just about skipped down the aisle toward them.
And then he stepped out into the aisle from the other side. The mask he wore was burned into Sierra's brain from the night before, as it was the one the killer had worn in the movie her parents had been watching. She froze, hoping he wouldn't see her, but of course she wasn't that lucky.
She threw her hands up to her face, though that did nothing to block out her own imagined version of his kill from the night before. "One..." She knew it was a costume - they were in a costume shop, after all - but wouldn't this be the perfect place for him to hide? Everyone would assume it was just a costume, and then he'd be free to do what he wanted, and... "T-Two..." She was sure she could hear, almost even feel, his footsteps as he approached, closer and closer, probably reaching for his knife. "Th-Th-Three..." She didn't think she could hear them anymore, but that was almost worse. Was he standing there, waiting to strike? Could she feel his hot breath on the back of her neck? "F-Four..." She wanted so badly to open her eyes, to find out if she should be running, but she was afraid it would break the spell. "F-F-F...." She stammered, pressing her hands hard into her eyes as she trembled. She could feel her bladder emptying into her pants, but it was the least of her worries. She had to get that last number out, and she had to do it now, but she just couldn't. "F... F... Five!"
She opened her eyes with a gasp, looking around, and, sure enough, he was gone. She gave a nervous twitter of laughter, then hurried to the wands and grabbed one, practically running back to Miss Claire. She was glad her nanny wasn't there, because she would have known for sure right away that she'd had an accident as she handed the wand, tipped with a star and ribbons, over.
"Good job!" Miss Claire praised her with a smile. But while Sierra watched, that smile began to darken as the woman's eyes ran over her, and she asked the inevitable, awful question, "Sierra, do you have something you need to tell me?"
"N-No..." Sierra stammered, not expecting Miss Claire to be brave enough to check her in public, but a quick pat on the girl's bottom seemed to tell her all she needed to know.
Once they were in the car, Sierra tried to explain, but Miss Claire was having none of it, and when Sierra refused to let her put her into a diaper, the girl quickly found that the woman was just as good with the hairbrush as her nanny, and she spent the next half hour in the corner, doing her best not to rub her red, swollen bottom through her pink diaper. She had hoped that her parents would understand when they got home, but they seemed quite happy with Miss Claire for how she'd handled things, giving Sierra a scolding for being such a naughty girl.
They wouldn't even listen to reason when she asked if she could wear a Pull-Up under her costume instead of a diaper, just while trick-or-treating was going on. "We don't want you to ruin your costume," they said, and when she said she wouldn't, they replied, "If you're not good, we'll make you answer the door in your sleeper and a double diaper."
Answering the door was much better than going trick-or-treating herself, she quickly realized. Most of the really scary people weren't out for candy, but for general mischief, so they weren't as likely to come to the door, and with the mothers taking their kids out, she still had plenty of people to coo over how cute her costume was, even if she had to keep tugging the skirt down to try to hide her diaper, and the redness extending out from underneath it from her spankings. She even got to stay up a little later than the night before, even though she was sure her behavior would otherwise have landed her in bed just as early.
She went to bed with a sense of relief, knowing that Halloween was over. Despite the fact that Thanksgiving was sooner, it was now the Christmas season as far as most everyone was concerned. Stores already had some decorations up, but soon there'd be even more. Bats and witches and cobwebs would soon be replaced by snowmen and reindeer and Santas. Even though it had landed her in diapers the year before, Christmas was still her favorite holiday, not least of all because it was a relief after the stress of Halloween. Not even her mother's warning that if she had another accident that day that would be three days in a row, and she'd be losing her Pull-Up privileges until her nanny got back, could dampen her good mood.
Sierra hummed happily to herself as she sat on the floor of the living room, coloring a My Little Pony picture while the television droned on. Even before everything had happened, she'd always enjoyed cartoons, so she had no problem when Miss Claire had suggested she watch some, but now they were over, replaced by the news, which had always kind of bored her, though she did look up as one of the anchors mentioned the Day of the Dead, seeing a parade full of dancing skeletons. But with Halloween behind her, it didn't bother her too much, and it was much easier to see that they were just people in costumes. No big deal. She went back to coloring.
"Can I borrow this?"
Sierra looked back up from her picture, furrowing her brow at the unfamiliar voice. She was a bit startled to see a little girl in front of her, maybe six or seven, in overalls and pigtails, looking at her green crayon. "What are you doing here?" Sierra asked, looking over at the front door, wondering why she hadn't heard it open.
"This is my house," the girl told her matter of factly. It was only then that Sierra noticed she looked quite pale, and her clothes and hair looked faded, not like they were hand-me-downs, but more like they were from a bad copy of an old picture.
Sierra began to shiver a little, just for a moment. She covered her eyes. She wasn't sure if it was the fact it had worked so well before, or just her good mood in general, but she felt very confident as she counted, "One, two, three..." She knew she was just being silly, that the stupid news had just tricked her into imagining things. "Four, five!" she finished up, pleased with herself for not freaking out. Her nanny would be proud of her! When she wrote her letter to Santa, she'd be sure to put in a note for her nanny that thanked her for teaching her the little charm, simple as it was.
When she opened her eyes, the girl was right in front of her, staring right into them. "What are you doing?" she asked as Sierra gasped and nearly leapt out of her skin. When Sierra didn't answer, the girl pointed to the crayon again. "Can I have it?" Sierra nodded dumbly, and the girl picked the crayon up with a smile before fading away into nothingness, taking the crayon with her. But that wasn't the only thing she took.
"It's not my fault!" Sierra wailed as she ran into the kitchen to Miss Claire. "The stupid counting thing didn't work, and that's the only reason I was so scared! I wouldn't have done it otherwise! She said nothing could hurt me if I did that!"
"What are you talking about?" Miss Claire asked, confused. "Are you hurt?"
"Well... No..." Sierra had to admit, ducking her head.
Immediately, Miss Claire knew what had happened. "Sierra!" she scolded. "Already?!"
"It's not my fault!" Sierra sniffled. It was so unfair! "It was the ghost!"
"Sweetie, there's no such thing as ghosts. You just got scared, that's all, and you had another accident. And you know what that means."
Her nanny had worked hard to stop her from having tantrums, and Sierra did her best to suppress them, knowing they got her in trouble, but in this case, she just couldn't help it. "No! No fair! No diaper!" She stomped her feet, face reddening, and when Miss Claire tried to take her hand to take her to her room, she sat down firmly on her squishy Pull-Up and started kicking and thrashing her arms. "No!"
Somewhere in the middle of the outburst, Miss Claire left, returning with her arms full of supplies. First, she popped Sierra's pacifier into her mouth, which shut her up quickly and surprised her just enough to give Miss Claire the chance to start changing her right there on the floor, using a liberal amount of baby powder and lotion before sealing the diaper up. Sierra cried as she looked down at the pink, bulging thing. "I big giwl!" she mumbled unhappily behind her pacifier. The diapering had quieted her tantrum, but hadn't quite killed it, and, defiantly, and without thinking, she grabbed for the diaper's tape.
Had she not been throwing a fit, had she been thinking clearly, she never would have done it, but in the heat of the moment, her mind was intent only on getting out of the diaper. But, like her pacifier and bed rails, the diapers were special, too, and as soon as she touched the tape, she felt a cramp in her tummy. She whimpered, pulling her hand away, but it was too late. Only the hard, linoleum floor she was sitting on had kept her from having an accident right away, and even that was imperfect, as she could feel the warm, gooey mess oozing out slowly into her diaper.
"I sowwy!" she whimpered into her pacifier, hoping somehow that would break the spell, but she only felt more miserable as she pressed her sore, full bottom down into the floor, trying futilely to fight the oncoming storm. She didn't want to do it, but at the same time, not doing it was almost worse. She hadn't had a messy accident in months now, but she knew that time was over, that she was going to be back to doing it all in her diapers from now on, at the very least through Christmas, but probably for a while afterward, too. She should get used to it.
But, even so, she couldn't bring herself to do it, to admit defeat and let go, as if she thought somehow stopping it would prove she didn't need diapers after all. Her mouth began sucking automatically on the pacifier as she squirmed uncomfortably on the floor, trying to find a position that would let her be comfortable until the cramps passed enough that she could make a dash for the bathroom, and hope Miss Claire would undo the tapes for her.
She gasped as, in her squirming, she lifted her bottom just a touch from the floor, and she felt her body take advantage, starting to pump a load of mushy mess out into that space. "No!" she whined before going back to sucking intently, her body already caught up in the act, and she felt herself lifting her backside further off the floor as her diaper began to fill, expanding behind her like a balloon.
"Oh, Sierra!" Miss Claire shook her head. "Already? Clearly you aren't a big girl - I can't believe your parents even considered letting you wear Pull-Ups. Well, for throwing a tantrum, I think you're going to have to wait until after lunch for a diaper change. And then you're going down for your nap right away. Got it?"
Sierra nodded resignedly, pouting as she was helped to her feet, her body depositing the last of its load into her diaper as she started to waddle over to the table and its hard, uncomfortable, wooden chairs. As she sat down with a squish, she mumbled a grumpy, "I hate Hawwoween."
