Last nights dream
This isn't a fantasy story,it's an actual dream I had last night,not many of us remember dreams well but I tend to recall “special dreams” and this comes under that category as it's the third similar I've had in a week and is by far the most profound and I VERY rarely have dreams of this nature,in fact I cannot recall any similar dreams in 51 years of life and today is my birthday so maybe it was a present from the dream fairy :)
Some aspects of the dream are muddled as dreams often are so forgive me any inconsistencies,I'm writing as I remember it and strangely a few more things are coming back to me.
All I can say is this dream gave me an immense feeling of peace all day while I'm suffering from stress.
For some reason the dream was set in the 80's or 90's,a good 10 years out of sync as I'm about 17 in the dream so it should be the 70's,but there were aspects of the former periods in there.
I'm at college(in real life I never went to college but did go to university at the age of 41 as a mature student)and as I said I'm about 17 in the dream.
There's a function,some kind of fund raiser ball,but not a womanless pageant,the girls can come as girls,but the boys also have to come as girls!
I don't know the reason why,that part is missing from the dream.
(The reason I'm writing it down is I don't want to forget the dream)
For some reason there is an older man who drives me to the ball,DEFINITELY not my father but I don't know who he is,I do know he only takes me there,afterwards I walk home alone.
I remember the dressing at home where I think I live alone and I remember the outfit very well though there is one discrepancy.
I'm not the prom princess but dressed simply and it's a warm evening.
I'm wearing a white top,white cardigan,pale blue knee length skirt,white hose,and black mid heel court shoes,the discrepancy is that in another part of the dream I'm wearing white mid heeled strappy sandals that show off my pink painted toenails(I've never,yet,painted my nails)
Later in the dream,toward the end,I see my nail polish worn and it seems the most natural thing in the world to redo them.
I'm also wearing a single string pearl choker.
My hair is my own,collar length,blonde and styled to flip over one ear with a white flower,I think a lily in my hair.
My makeup was assisted by a woman but that part of the dream is missing.
I guess I look kind of preppy?
At the ball/party nobody recognises me en femme but I spend a lot of time NOT socialising for exactly that reason as I'm almost totally anonymous.
Other boys have either not made a good effort to dress or have gone over the top or just simply don't pass,I seem to pass.
I'm on my own but like it that way yet at the same time I know I'm searching for someone.
I don't know her name but she is my kind of casual girlfriend,more like my best friend in college.
When I find her she's sitting at a long table drinking with her friends,she simply raises her glass and smiles as if to say “you're okay”.
I think it was her that did my makeup but me that chose the outfit.
I'm still pretty anonymous and don't mingle but in the next dream sequence I'm outside on a bridge rolling a cigarette,some memory fades here but someone replaces my hand rolled with a pack of cigarettes,I guess girls shouldn't roll their own!
Now it gets weird,I'm leaning on a stone table right in the centre of the bridge enjoying a drink and my cigarette in the warm evening air,my white cardigan isn't on me,maybe I left it back at the party.
The stone table I'm leaning on I'm guessing is some kind of gateway on the bridge because in front of it is the building where the ball/party is,behind is a well lit car park and people not coming onto the bridge,however,as I face the house,to my immediate right are three males aged about 25 sitting on the parapet,I only remember one face,bleached blonde spiked hair,masculine chubby,obviously gay,dressed in a black satin T-shirt and black PVC jeans,something that does nothing for me at all(and I might add I am hetero)
Curiously he wore pearls.
I remember exactly what he asked me.
“We can't get in,do you know of any balls we can go to where we can be boys?”
And I remember replying:
And there were sighs from the other boys who couldn't pass the stone table on the bridge.
My next memory of the dream is days later(in the same dream)and deciding that my nails really needed doing again :)
I was perfectly happy!
And comfortable with who I now was.
I'm sorry if it appears disjointed but it's not a fantasy or a story,it is an actual dream I had and I felt the need to document it.