I looked on with desire as she ran her fingers through her auburn hair. I wanted nothing more in the world than to be with Britney. Britney didn't offer me much attention, however, other than the occasional smile in passing. Britney seemed to set her sights on guys like her boyfreind, Curt Lakewood. Curt was the delinquent type who seemed to regularly rent time in the detention room as if it were his own private suite.
Curt was already beyond the initial stages of puberty. His voice no longer squeaked. His frame was becoming muscular. Curt was energetic and aggressive.
I, on the other hand, had yet to display the signs of puberty. No voice crack, growth spurts, not even a hair. I did not get into trouble either. Not that I was a particularly good kid; I just lacked the energy and aggression of guys like Curt.
But, as if that weren't enough, I harbored a lot of embarassment. I had a lot of trouble with my continence. I wore diapers up until kindergarten, when I began wearing them only at night. This I did all throughout grade school. I stopped wearing diapers to bed before starting the 7th grade, but I still had trouble. On top of that, my mom would check me throughout the day to make sure I was properly cleaned, as I seemed to have trouble with that as well.
But even bigger of a secret was that I still occasionally breast fed. My mom would breast feed me if I were sad or depressed in order to calm me down. My mom, a single mother of an only child, lacked any firmness with regards to raising me; to an extreme. It was as if she had no expectation for me to grow up. This was my secret shame. I desparately wanted to break away from this. I wished my mom would just stop nursing me, like a normal mother. But when I was feeling down, the warm comfort was just too much for me to resist.
So naturally, I felt different from the other boys, and the other boys seemed to like to remind me of this. Basically, the main sports at the school consisted of football, basketball, baseball, and tormenting me. It was as if I walked around with a big target on me.
There was even a group of girls who liked to pick on me. Really, they were the only girls who gave me any attention. In fact, two of them were talking to Britney at this very moment, as I sat on the bleachers. Shelly, a lanky blond girl, seemed to be the ring leader of this group. And Teresa, a half hispanic girl, was not so agressive, but seemed to gain a sense of pleasure and satisfaction out of my torment. It was as if these girls would seek me out during the day just to pick on me.
As I sat on the bleachers, my humiliation began to well up inside me. That was when I heard, "No, no, stop!"
I looked over to see Britney struggling as Curt pulled at her and tried to wrestle her from her seat. It was probably more playful than anything, but seeing Curt wrestling with the girl of my dreams was more than I could bear. I was sick of how my life was going. I stood up with resolution; things were going to change NOW.
I marched over and gave Curt a shove. This didn't accomplish much, other than Curt laughingly saying "What are you doing?"
To which Britney replied, "He's helping me."
"Well, go help someone else," said Curt, and he shoved me away.
But I got right back up and gave Curt another heartfelt yet unsuccessful shove. At this, Curt turned around and decked me.
As intense pain shot through my head, my legs wobbled and I collapsed onto the floor. To my dismay, I couldn't stop sobs fom escaping my throat. At this point, I had the entire gymnasium's attention. Everybody watched on as I lay on the floor unable to keep myself from bawling.
"Why did you do that?" yelled Britney.
"Well he was being a pest," argued Curt.
Then, blinded through tears, I heard, "Oh my God, he peed his pants." It was Shelly's voice.
"I think he crapped himself too," said Teresa.
I realized that they were right. At the moment of impact, I had lost control of my bodily functions and just let go.
I felt a pair of arms wrap around me as I realized that Britney had come over to comfort me. Just then, I felt as Britney and Ms Rose, the gym teacher, tried to get me to my feet. But my legs just wouldn't work, so Ms Rose picked me up and carried me into the gym office. It was all I could do not to bury my head into her shoulder as I cried.
She laid me down on the bench in her office, and Britney helped her to get my pants off. Ms Rose would have done this in private, if not for Britney's insistence on helping. And with Britney, Shelly and Teresa followed. Eventually, half of the class was in the room as the other half waited outside the door.
As Ms Rose and Britney slid off my pants, I heard Shelly call out, "Oh my God, it's so tiny!"
To which Teresa responded, "It's cute."
Britney held up my legs as Ms Rose cleaned me up. I continued to sob, as Ms Rose cleaned off my exposed derriere in front of half the class. Ms Rose then went to get an empty garbage bag to put my soiled pants into, as I felt Britney caress my face. Ms Rose then returned and wrapped a towel around my waist.
Britney sat me on her lap and held me as my sobs died down. As I rested my head against Britney's soft bossom, my thumb found it's way into my mouth and I began to suck. It was as if I had no control.
On the one hand, it felt good sitting in Britney's arms as I sucked my thumb, but on the other hand, it was embarassing. I didn't want Britney to see my like this. I wanted her to see me as a man.
After a while, my mom entered the room. Ms Rose had called her at some point. Britney laid me back down on the bench.
"I knew he wasn't ready to be out of diapers yet," my mom said.
She unwrapped the towel and lifted my legs. She then pulled a bottle of baby powder out of her bag and liberally powdered my bottom. Then she pulled out a diaper, which she set my bottom onto and fastened around me. I noticed that she didn't bring a change of pants.
She then picked me up and sat down on the bench with me in her lap.
"Sh sh sh, just relax," she said.
Please tell me she's not going to...
She lifted her shirt and gently pushed my head underneath it.
For the love of God, No! Not here!
But I couldn't help myself, and before I knew it, I was sucking down warm sweet milk. I loathed myself for it, but I was uncontrolably compelled toward the feeling of comfort and security.
"Why did you do that," I heard Britney say, "can't you see he's just a baby?"
"I didn't know," said Curt.
"How could you not know?"
"I don't know," said Curt, "I guess I just thought he was a regular wimpy guy."
"How could you think that," she said, "He's so obviously a baby."
Just when I thought things couldn't get any lower, I realized that Britney thought of me as a baby even before this incident.
"Well, there shouldn't be any bruising," said Ms Rose to my mom, "He wasn't hit very hard."
"It doesn't take much," said my mom, "He's very delicate."
"See, it wasn't even that hard," said Curt.
"It was too hard for him," said Britney.
I became very relaxed.
I woke up in my bed with no idea how I got there. I realized that I was wearing feety pajamas. So I got up and left my room. Hearing conversation in the living room, I headed in that direction.
"Well look who's up," said Britney. She and my mom were in the living room.
Apparently, I had fallen asleep as my mom nursed me. So she brought me home, put me in my new pj's and put me to bed. I cringed at the thought of my mom carrying me, sleeping, around the school in front of anyone, as I wore a diaper and no pants to cover it.
Britney had stopped by after school to visit. Despite everything that she had already seen, I was embarassed to be wearing a pair of feety pajamas in front of her. She stayed for the evening and ate dinner with us. Later on, my mom decided to give me a bath. I hadn't been bathed by someone else since I was six, but it had just become a part of my daily ritual. My only protest was, "What? No." But at this point I was too drained to put up a fight.
Britney stayed and helped my mom bathe me. Then, at 8 pm, she helped her put me to bed. I don't know how long Britney stayed after I fell asleep, but I awoke to her the next morning.
"Hey sweetie," she said, as she caressed my face.
She then pulled down the cover and proceeded to change my diaper. She sprinkled powder on my bottom, and then I felt her gental caress as she spread the baby powder around my diaper area with her finger, before patting it. She then fastened the new diaper. Then she bent over me and tenderly kissed me on the cheek. Britney helped me get ready for the day, and then walked me to the bus stop, holding my hand.
Britney pretty much became my care taker after that. In the morning, she would come by to get me ready and then take me to school. During the course of the day, she would track me down in between classes to see if I needed a change, and then change me if I did. Then, in the evening, she would always at least stop by. She would often have dinner and stay for the evening. She was always there when my mom needed a sitter. And generally, whenever she was around, she insisted on being the one to change me, bathe me, and tuck me in. Even if she had other plans, she would at least stop by. And sometimes she would even take me with her where she was going. Her taking care of me started up the social life that I had never had before.
At school, whereas I was pretty much ignored before, now everybody knew who I was. People didn't seem to give me a whole lot of trouble anymore, either. It was like they no longer saw me as an equal, so they didn't hold me up to the same standards as everyone else. Now that people saw me as a baby, they just let me be a baby. People even referred to me as "Britney's baby."
Shelly and Teresa, however, had a new way to torment me. They would still hunt me down, only now they would talk to me like a baby, pinching my cheeks and the like. They didn't do this to be mean, however. They genuinly viewed me as a cute baby now.
Britney still dated Curt. It pained me to see them together, knowing that he offered what she wanted in a man and I didn't. I would often see her hanging on him or wrestling with him. Sometimes she would bring him over when she babysat. She would be doing something with me, and he'd pull her away, pin her down, and they'd make out. One time, this happened while she was in the middle of changing me.
"It's so tiny," she said, referring to my little wee-wee. "It's hard to believe that something so big on you can be so small on him."
"Do you want mine to be small like that?" asked Court.
"No way," said Britney, "I love your big manly one."
At that point, he grabbed her and pulled her away. As he pinned her, and she submitted in passion, I looked down at my tiny exposed little wee-wee, knowing full well that I could never offer what she needed in a man.
She would then put me to bed, and then go back out and cuddle with him. I would fall asleep knowing this.
It struck me that Curt often tried to get her pants off, and often succeeded. I would never be able to get her pants off or even see her out of them, unless she were in a bathing suit. But she had full clearance to take off my pants whenever she saw fit. And that was often.
Reguardless, she may have felt a lot of passion for Curt as her man, but she had even more for me as her baby. She would never let Curt get in the way of her caring for me. She often abandoned Curt in favor of me. In fact, over the years I saw boyfreinds come and go, but I was always her baby. Nothing could get between me and her. Not even a boyfreind.
As she changed my diaper, I would see her looking down at me with love in her beautiful green eyes. Her hands were so tender and nurturing. She would then get on top of me and start kissing my face. She would caress me all over with those beautiful delicate hands and then kiss me passionately on the mouth. Then she'd put me in my fresh diaper, and then take me and hold me in her arms for awhile. I had come to embrace my place as Britney's baby.
Eventually, she even had lactation treatment done so that she could nurse me. At this point, there was no more shame in it for me. Only pure pleasure as I'd nuzzle against her warm comfy breasts, smelling her comforting scent, and drink her sweet milk.
I felt so comfy and secure in her arms, but at the same time, I brought her an inate sense of joy and pleasure. At one point, I realized that even before she really knew me, she knew me. She could see what my mom knew about me; that at my core I was a baby and always would be a baby. She had always known this just by looking at me. It was my destiny to belong to her, and all I wanted was to be her baby.