The Book Of Really Odd Tales

By Amy Sadler

© 2018

Book Three: In The Red Is Fred

Part 1

There once was a 18 year old boy called Fred Mills, he had dark brown hair, it was shoulder length, he had brown eyes, he was 5ft and 4in tall and he was of slim build. Fred had no mum or dad, they had died many years ago he lived with his grandmother instead, who was the only living relative that Fred had. He had been woken from his sleep, he felt odd somehow. “Get up you lazy bones. I need plenty of fire wood, it’s going to be a cold winter this year. Remarked Grandma Mills.

“What? You always say that.” Fred complained who was trying to figure out what was wrong, something was, but he just did not know what that was. “It happens to be the truth, that’s why.”

“Yeah, but it’s always a cold winter, every winter.” Replied Fred not really wanting to get up out of his bed. “Well there is no such thing as a warm winter now is there?” Replied Grandma Mills, not sounding too happy with Fred’s lazy attitude.

She quickly threw the bedcovers off, of Fred’s bed, he was wearing his usual red and white PJ’s as red and white was Fred’s favourite colour. That said, he got into a pair of blue Y-Fronts, a white shirt, a black woolly jumper, and a pair of blue jeans. On his feet was a pair of black boots with a woollen inside, to help keep his feet warm. He hated firewood duty, yet his grandma made him do it every winter.

He was just about to go out of the wooden hut that was his and his grandmas home, when she called out to him. “Aren’t you forgetting something?” Just near by the front door hung from a hanger, was a red cloak, a thick red cloak, made of velvet. “Oh grandma, please don’t make me wear that thing again… Please?”

“Why not? It’s a perfectly good winter cloak.”

“Yes, but it is a little girls cloak.” Replied Fred with dismay, but Grandma Mills wasn’t going to let Fred go off without it.

“Nonsense my dear boy. I was wearing that exact cloak when I once used to be your age.”

“Yeah I know. You told me more than a dozen times already, it’s the same cloak that your mother before you, who wore one exactly like it, when she had been just a little girl, but the design however, has always remained the same, regardless of how old the girl was that was expected to wear it, as it had become a family tradition.”

Grandma Mills gave Fred a little smile. “I’m so glad at least there is one thing that I have taught you that you still remember. Now don’t be such a silly boy, you’ll put on that red cloak as it’s the only thing that will help to keep you warm outside, I won’t have you catching your death of cold out there.” Replied Grandma Mills as she took down the red cloak that did look like it had been designed for a little girl, only it was in Fred’s exact size.

She put the cloak firmly around him and tied it tight, so that the cloak would not come undone, or fall off, of Fred, while he walks. Fred went red with embarrassment. “But what if should someone see me out there in this?” Replied Fred in distress. “Don’t be silly, we live out in the middle of the woods. No one’s going to see you but the birds and the bees and they would not know the difference if you’re a boy or a girl.”

Fred could tell that there was no getting out of either situation gathering the firewood, while wearing a girly red cloak. But off he went out into the woods, feeling silly, but there was nothing at all that he could do about it. Just then while not looking where he was going, Fred pumped into something, or more to the point, someone. A figure all in black, towering over him stood on two hind legs, with the fore legs acting like arms that ended into two large paws.

For this was not at all a person, but a Wolf, or Mr Wolfenstein he was known to both Grandma Mills and to Fred. Mr Wolfenstein growled and snarled. “Why don’t you watch where you are walking young little girl.” Yes I know it’s not often that you can find wolves that can actually talk. Mr Wolfenstein was one of the very few ones that could actually talk. And he was anything but mean or nasty, in fact he was quite the perfect gentleman, correction, a gentle wolf, to Grandma Mills.

“What? I’m no little girl.” Remarked Fred in shock. “Oh, it’s you!” Remarked Mr Wolfenstein in a not so happy tone of voice. “Look, I’m sorry that I walked into you okay?” Remarked Fred in a slightly frightened tone of voice. “I’ll let you off on that, but you still owe me rent. In fact you have been long way overdue since you turned eighteen.”

“Just how am I supposed to be able to you pay you?”

Remarked Fred, trying to sound brave, but failed at doing so. “Why do you think that your grandmother has you working out in the middle of the woods for? That wood is not just simply for your home, my home needs firewood too and you are old enough to pay for your own rent, you can’t expect your grandmother to pay it for you. She tried to give me some, I accepted but only a small amount as a courtesy to her, but I told her that you would have to pay me the rest of what you owe.”

“I… I don’t have the money.” Mr Wolfenstein looked shocked and surprised. “What on earth do you spend all that money on boy?” But Fred lost his temper and replied in an angry tone of voice. “Oh don’t you start calling me boy too. I’m fed up with my grandmother calling me that. I’m a grown man now.” Mr Wolfenstein did not much like Fred’s attitude. “In that case, I strongly suggest that you start to act and behave like one, by earning your keep. That house hut used to be mine, but I began to miss the wide open fields etc. So I let your Grandmother have that house hut, in fact it was her who insisted on paying me rent for the place. I accepted of course.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” Replied Fred, as though he really did not care for Mr Wolfenstein’s story.

“Very well, I shall be on my way.” Replied Mr Wolfenstein not sounding too happy with Fred’s retort. He soon reached the wooden house hut of Grandma Mills. He politely knocked on the front door. Grandmother was delighted to see who it was at her front door. “Well, bless my soul. My good old friend Mr Wolfenstein, come in come in.”

Remarked Grandma Mills in a very happy tone of voice. “Oh and when did you become so formal Emma? Please do call me Wolfe. I know that you love to do so and it also makes me feel young when you call me by that name.” Remarked Mr Wolfenstein in a warm gentle tone of voice. Grandma Mills gave him a big smile. “I am so glad that you still do, after all this time that you want me to call you that.”

“I could never tire of hearing you call me by that name.” Replied Mr Wolfenstein with a smile. “So what brings you here Wolfe?”

“Dare I say it, but it is the matter of your grandson, he still has not paid me for the rent that he owes me and he’s literally in the red.” Replied Wolfe, not sounding too happy about that fact. “Oh dear. I am so sorry to hear that. I honestly do not know what he spends the money on. He gets paid well enough for his work.”

“Of that I have no doubt of Emma.” Replied Wolfe with a reassuring tone in his voice. “I honestly do not know what to do with him. He’s rude to me sometimes, he’s lazy, ungrateful. All of that said, he is my only grandson, I really do not want anything bad to happen to him. Oh… if only he were a little girl, he’d be much easier to manage, with him being that way.” Replied Emma almost in tears. “Hmmm.” Suddenly remarked. Wolfe with a smile on his face, as he said to Grandma Mills. “I think I just might have the perfect idea.”

TO BE CONTINUED.