Since then, I've actually had multiple accidents. About two weeks after my baby vacation I wet the bed. I was a little alarmed, but i dealt with it by diapering myself while I slept. Two days later, it happened again but my diaper didn't leak. I suppose I should have been alarmed it happened again, but instead I got a little giddy about it and started drinking a bottle before bed. Wetting myself in my sleep is now a regular occurence, and I actually like that it is.
But bedwetting isn't where this post ends. I actually have had problems the past year with leaks due to damage to my urinary tract due to kidney stones. About two weeks ago I was sitting in my chair and i felt the urge to go. I got up to head to the potty and promptly let go with more than a leak. I full on wet myself, and once I realized it was happening I didn't stop it. Since then I've actually just stayed in my diapies. Through probably the damage on top of the mental conditioning I've been putting myself through, I feel like I'm on my way to diaper dependence.
I'm actually kinda thrilled at the prospect. I'm nearly at the point where everytime I haveto go, I go atomatically. furthermore, I've started looking up ways to become fully incontenant. Being i. Diapers constantly, I fin little point in using the potty at all, instead filling my diaper when I hve to go. I got ued to it really quick last December and now just go. I totally want full diaper training, since I'm funtionally diaper trained right now.
Anyone have any pointers on how to teach myself to be unable to hold in my messes?
"They see you as small and helpless
They see you as just a child
Surprise when they find out that a warrior will soon run wild
Prepare for your greatest moments
Prepare for your finest hour
The dream that you've always dreamed is
Suddenly about to flower"
