considering a srs operation

All XXX considering a srs operation

been thinking it over

Posted on August 6th, 2012 ~ 4:19 pm

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hello everyone, i have been here at sk for a little over 2 years and thats including my old account diapeyboy21. i have been researching srs operations to figure out if its right for me. i'll be honest right now i dont like being a male nor do i have the full or even a quarter of a males mentality. i love the thought of what it would b like as a female. to b able to get all dressed up and able to go outside all gussied up and looking for the perfect guy to sweep me off my feet. i am bi lets get that straight. i have also discovered how feminime i really am. for example, i hate hairy legs, armpits, genitals and love smooth skin, and smelling very pretty. most male colognes do not appeal to me at all. but honestly its not just the physical feastures i would like as a female, i would like to b as cute and pretty on the outside as i feel on the inside. its not that i cant stand males cuz believe me i have met some real hotties but never flirted with them of course i myself being a male. i love being girly and would really like to have this little girl thats trapped in this boy body to come out and see the world. yes i know this is a very big decision and may not turn out as i would like and im willing to take that risk. not planning for anything soon tho i'd like to do a bit more research on the subject to see if its really right for me. i do feel like its the right decision and not saying its going to b a easy path at all. in fact its easier said than done. i dont know how this will affect my family, i have brought the subject up a couple of times with them but never gave them a clue that i want to do it. kinda scared on what they would think. they do know about me being a sissy/ sissy adult baby. it doesnt really seem to bother them but that is just a small thing in my book but to alter my physical appearence is a very big thing. i would like to tell them sometime on it to see what they think. my family is a very open minded group of people but how open minded is the question. im just worried if i do decide to go this route and then tell my family that they would try to talk me out of it saying that im young and dont know what im doing or my reasoning for this isnt quite right. and honestly if u have seen some of the pics i have posted here on sk of me ( for reference look under the thread fashion & beauty under the subject sexy sissy babes with the screen name DB21version2 i have posted my photobucket album link there ) i have a very good looking body that can easily b sculpted into a female. but once again its not just the appearance im going for. im just trying to match my body to my mind and female mentality. i would love to b a real girl full time and cherish every moment of it. i do have a favor to ask from all of u if u want to help me, i was hoping maybe to u who read this can help me research the subject by posting helpful links to sites that may help me along the way i would greatly appreciate it. as g.i.joe would say it knowledge is power! sorry a bit off topic but ressume now, i would love to hear comments from all of u and some support. well thats all for now will update when i can will keep in touch on the subject.

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Posted August 8th, 2012 ~ 4:57 pm

hi everyone me again well there has been some news since i last posted tho this was before i found out the love of my life passed away sorry for being morbid. anyways i sat down and talked to my mom finally about me having a srs operation. she was a bit shocked and said well as a child she didnt notice me taking a interest in being a girl, so i explain to her y i have kept it a secret for so long. she said in her own opinion that i shouldnt do it esp. without enough research for it. she also said dont let my opinion stop u if u feel its right for u and will make your life easier and more comfortable to live then do what you think is right for you. she said she would support me in my decision whatever it may be. kinda made me relieve that she was understanding. i told her not to tell anyone else just yet till i know for certian its what i want to do. though with the recent loss i have suffered i have been unmotivated to do further research on myself on this subject. hopefully i can get myself back together and back on track. once again if anyone can help me find sites that will help me along the way its much appreciated!!!

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Diaperskirt

Posted August 8th, 2012 ~ 6:11 pm

Hi honey. For a decision like this, it's required you get a psychiatric evaluation from a specialist in transgendered studies. If they can ascertain that this may be right for you then they can start you on hormones, which is proper procedure anyway, and you can have lots of time before you decide if srs is what you really want to go through. Hormone therapy takes at least a year from what I've heard but regardless if it's something you're considering you need to see a specialist. And you are lucky to have such a supportive family.

Good luck in your endeavors.

~To be a girl is to be honest and expressive of your emotions. To wear diapers shows comfort in your body and trust in another~
I like to play Would You Rather and Dress Up, so come play with me in the games section. ^_^
*Formerly tutu49*

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Posted August 9th, 2012 ~ 3:37 am

thank you diaperskirt. i have done enough research to know that. my problem is mostly the cost and the time it takes and all the notes i have to get from different doctors just to b approved for the rlt (real life training). i understand that there is a right procedure for this and that i have to b sure its what i want. im currently waiting till the 14th of this month, thats when i go see my shrink. ill b talking to him about it. i have brought this subject up to him before and i only said a few things about it and left it at that but now since im getting really serious about it i want to bring it up to him now more than ever he maybe able to get me to the proper people i need to see on this. esp now since my female side is showing more and more each day. i have to face the facts too im not getting any younger either. from what i understand as the body ages changes like this can b really hard on the body esp in older age. not trying to rush it but im not trying to sit around and have the chance to pass me up if its the right thing for me to do. but i much appreciate your input!!!!!! it helps me out!!!!

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Baby Bethany

Posted August 9th, 2012 ~ 4:33 am

I can't really add much but you have my sincere condolences for your recent loss. I also hope you can get the SRS you clearly need to be the person you are inside.

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Posted August 9th, 2012 ~ 4:38 am

thank you baby bethany at least shes in a better place. and thank you for your comment. your input counts to me!!! it is very much appreciated!!!!!!

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Posted August 11th, 2012 ~ 8:21 pm

well now its only 3 days away from me seeing my shrink. i am very excited right now. my hopes are high. i have been talking to alot of my friends in chat about this and have shown some pics of me to them. im flattered to say some of them have asked if i was a transexaul and already on hormones. of course i havent started any of the hormone therapy yet. but am flattered due to the fact it makes me think that i look more womanly than once thought. not only that but my personality fits that of a female. sorry if im not stating facts right now its only cuz i want to get my thoughts down on this and the comments my friends have been giving me. but i regress, i havent been only thinking of the pros of this procedure either. there r cons like for example wanting to have a baby with my body. tho i may have the gender for it i wont have the neccessary working parts for the function. surgical technology can only do so much. tho i have read that they have been experimenting with procedures to make this possible for people who have the operation. but thats just one con out of many. there r others like family rejections, friends leaving over the fact they dont approve, so on and so forth. i hope maybe one day that if someone who is considering the procedure for themselves finds this and will hopefully serve as some helpful guidence along the way. anyways i have to go now smells like my mom is almost done with dinner and it smells real good so ill stop for today and post another update when it comes around. btw thanks everyone who has given me comments i really appreciate them and hope to hear more.

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Posted August 12th, 2012 ~ 3:51 pm

well i think im almost completely done with researching this whole decision. i have pretty much read through all the proccesses, procedures, outcomes, and the pros and cons of the whole thing. though i am still a bit nervous about this decision esp. since not very many people in my life know about it just yet, but i feel this is the right thing to do with my life. i feel i am happiest when i can dress up like a female and act like one, cant say the same when im dressed as a male and having to act like one. anyways i want to have this operation i feel its in my best interest. now the only thing i need to know and wont know till i have some counseling done on the topic is if i am mentaly prepared and equiped for this change in life. although i may feel its right and it seems right doesnt neccessarly make it right for me. if i cant handle the changes then the end result could b disasterous. anyways i have to go once again have to finish looking up a part i ordered and a few other things. im going for a few hour walk today hopefully to clear my mind and get some fresh air.

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Posted August 12th, 2012 ~ 8:45 pm

well i dont usually posts twice in the same post on the same day but while i was out walking around i kinda had one of those memory lane kinda moments. i was walking in the part of town where i had the most greatest experience one time tho i tried to deny it at the time and tried to blow it off like i didnt care but really deep down it made me feel happy. i was about 12 or 13 at the time and was walking around and this was when i had very long hair btw, a couple of guys who look older than me tried to call me over and talk to me. at the time i was a bit anti social so i was talking to them from across the street. they kept asking me if i was a girl or not and of course trying to put up a manly fasod i told them how bout u come over and find out and then i kept walking hearing them off in the distant talking to eachother argueing over the fact if i was a girl or not. one was saying that i was and the other saying i wasnt. then before i could no longer hear them the one who was saying i was a girl said i looked very beautiful and no way was a guy. kinda made me feel real good. but this is what my problem in life growing up and making me think now that the case of my gender identity is a truely rare and unique one. now i do have some common ground with the most common cases of gender identity, but the difference with me is that even tho i was into being a girl, but in my home life i tried so hard to deny it. of course some people with the same problem can relate the same way with me on this, but heres where it gets a bit different from most. to me it seem like a curse. during the day i had to keep my female interest separate from trying to act like a male but when night came around and i was by myself i was completely a different person and gender. now usaully after so long of doing this most people with a gender identity problem finally come out and tell everyone who they really are, but in my case i kept a secret fearing of what people would say or do to me. eventually i felt like there was something seriously wrong with me and maybe it was wrong to be this way. i tried for so long to keep it under wraps so no one would know the kind of personal battle i had going on inside me. i was born a male, was raised a male and so i thought i was suppose to be a male. i now realize i was wrong in this idea. simply of the fact i was denying who i truly am. its been many years before i finally had accepted the fact that i maybe a male physically but that doesnt mean anything for my mental gender. all people are hardwired in the brain differently from others. i like to use the metaphor that sometimes the hardware does not match the software. i would fall into this situation. i do admit even with as female my body already looks i kinda do regret never saying anything while growing up. though its not too late for my hardware to match my software if i do this now, but it could have been a lot easier and a lot better had i done this at a earlier age. i know the proccess may take a few years before i can actaully go through the procedure, so i really dont want to waste anymore time. but this is why i feel my case is soo unique. like i said most people do this at a early age, but with me and being very different on my thinking of how everything will go both in life and on the table, i kinda felt like i had no choice but to be the gender i was born physically with. as i have now grown a bit older and now seen the errors of my thinking and am a bit more wiser i guess it works to my advantage cuz i can look at this from a better point of view and a higher sense of understanding. anyways im going to post this now and will keep updates as they come along.

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Posted August 15th, 2012 ~ 7:21 am

since technly its now tomorrow right now so ill use past tense here. i went to see my shrink finally yesterday. he gave me helpful numbers and sites to visit. well that and places that may be doing groups for people going thru this proccess. am a bit dissappointed tho to find out that since i am already seeing a counselor i cant get in to see a therapist that deals with these issues. so when i go see him next week im going to ask a few things. i dont have much of anything else right now so ill just end this. bye for now and will keep posting updates as they arrive.

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