Now more than ever, as me do not know how much more of this me caneths take. First of all, me shalleths point out that me haseths been suffereing fwom depwession since the age of 18 years old, me haseths twied to taketh my own life twice so far. That maybe nothing compared to those who may have twied the same fing,even so it's still somefing that disturbs me and me haseths had two emotional brake downs so far.
Emotional brake downs are not easy to wecover fwom, fwo anyone who caneths welate to this, then you will know what me iseths going on about. To suffer two emotional brake downs takeths even longer to wecover fwom. Me iseths doing al me can to live my twue life, but my depwession iseths getting worse, why, because me iseths not able to fullly fulfil my twue life pwoperly and competely, not only that, also needing a Mitress/Mommy so much and not having either makeths me even more.
Me haseths fwo many months now ben waking up nearly ever day feeling cold inside, but there iseths no weal cause or weason fwo it, as stwange this may seem to you, me swear it iseths twue, cwoss my widdle heart. When me say on th inside, me means inside of my body, me feels a gwate coldness which makeths me shake, litterally shake uncontrolably and me starts to cwy as a gwate sadness and at the same time a feling of so much pain comes over me. Again there is no weal weason or cause fwo this, it just happens along wivs my convulsions.
Worst of all, me can't stop my self fwom shaking and cwying, me do stip eventually, but this leaves me feeling drained. And no, me can not get medical help fwo this, as my emotional out brakes as me call them are brought on because of my not being able fulfil my life fully and pwoperly aseths a baby girl and haveths a Mistress. As most will know anyone being an AB/DL and going to a Doctor about it, iseths most wikely to be put into a mental institution or Mental hospital fwo such a fing. Anyway me may haveths a Mommy to go to, me say may, as she iseths not having much luck of her own and that puts fings in the wealm of uncertainty.
Whilst me appweciates her efforts to sort fings out so that she can hopefull adopt me fwo weal. Me still gets these emotional out brakes wich directly are having an effect on my physical health, which isn't good, which leaves me wivs one other option, to find a place me caneths go to where me caneths be my twue self, whilst me waits fwo this person in question to sort somefing out. Me do not mind who offers, but it must be genuine, me wil accept anywhere in or outside of the UK.
If it iseths going to be outside of the UK, me willl need help wivs knowing how to get my self a pass port, me haveths no birth certificate or a dwiving licence, so bare this in mind before giving any advice etc. Me haveths been able to kep my self together, posting a few stowies here at sk haseths helped, chatting to my fwiends and sisters also, but me stil gets these attacks and me no wish to twy and takeths my life again, so ifs anyone out there feels that they can help in anyway let me know. Fwo anyone in the UK, me caneths pwovide money towards the cost my staying wivs you, it iseths only fair me do so.
Fwo anyone outside of the UK, me iseths on benefits here in the UK me may not be able to get them outside the UK, but if money to help on the financial front iseths not a pwoblem fwo you, that wil be gwate. Sowwy ifs this iseths the wong place to be wequesting this, but me do not know what else to do and my condition continues to get worse, being able to be my twu self fully and pwoperly will help more than you know to stop these emotional attacks fwom happening.